Who Am I?

Well, inquisitive reader, let me answer. I am a wife, a mom and I have chronic bad hair. I like made uppy words and Unnecessary Capitalization. If you know who the guy in the bottom right picture is, you're probably my best friend. Also, I own several Edward dolls which I write about HERE. No, I don't use drugs. By the way, if your love canned tomatoes, visit my stash HERE.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Keyboard Confessions

Every week I sit down and confess some things.  Mostly it's just an excuse to write a list.

1.  We have three cars in our possession.  Two of them are broken.  This leaves one car.  This also leaves me very stressed out.

2.  But, part of my stress is about to be relieved as I remembered to bring nail clippers to work with me. 

3.  Soon, I shall be able to write words like "about it" without writing "abou tit".  My nails super bad get in the way.

4.  Nails, in general, are just gross.  So is hair. They're just...rapidly growing skin cells.  That also happen to be dead.  It's like zombie body parts.  Gross.

5.  I think about weird things like this.  Also, you know how people break out?  What if we peeled off the top few layers of skin, would we see a whole bunch of zits all piled up?

6.  It's possible I read a little too much science fiction.

7.  Two words.  Felt food.  Much fun.  Easy peasy.  So that's actually like 6 words.

8.  We're trying this new thing at home.  It's called "Keep The House Clean All The Time". 

9.  It's also called "This Sucks".

10.  You know what doesn't suck?  Felt food.

11.  Are you confused?  Have no idea what felt food is?  Well, inquisitive reader, I shall remedy that for you.

12.  Felt Doritos.  *kisses fingertips*  My piece de resistance.  Also, a choking hazard for wee babes, which I forgot about whilst making them for my niece.  Alas. In about 3 years she can play with them. 

13.  Man I wished I liked coffee.  It smells soooo good.  But tastes soooo gross.  Like, I don't know, hickory smoked dirt. 

14.  I suppose I will stick to my early morning Diet Coke.  It's probably like motor oil for my belly.

15.  Speaking of motor oil, my husband valiently tried to fix our car last night and was covered with grease.  It was kind of rawr.

16.  But just on him.  If it was on me it would be kind of whimper/cry.  I don't like to be dirty.

17.  Two more words:  Netflix rocks the hizzouse.  That's like four words.  How come it took me like, 17 years to get on board with Netflix?

18.  I think I'm going to take Angie128's advice and bring a booster seat for my office chair. 

19.  That booster seat will make it all the more easier to watch The Dark Crystal during my lunch.  I wonder if I can pick up a Happy Meal? 

20.  If only I had a Snuggie.

Happy Friday, my friend.


Much More Than Mommy said...

Ooooh! I don't like coffee either, but I looove the way it smells!

We haven't done Netflix yet.

I still can't believe you were Winn's FB dealer.

The Retired One said...

Do it like me, girl...put about 2 cups of sugar and 1/2 cup cream with every cup of coffee...you'll be lovin' it before you know it.
None of that fake sugar crap..the real thing...

Rochelle said...

I LOVE LOVE LOVE my Netflix! I don't feel like I am waisting money if I chose to turn off a movie because I decide it is to much for me.

#5 will haunt me for life :)

Loving Wife, Working Mom said...

Since we got Netflix 3 weeks ago, I haven't watched live tv... actually, I would probably never leave the house if it wasn't because I have to work....I wonder if I can bring headphones to work and stream onto my computer.....

Kearsie said...

Much More Than Mommy, I was only the dealer TWICE.

The Retired One, that sounds like a whole lotta work. How about I just dip a Snickers Bar into a cup of coffee?

Rochelle, I know, it's not pretty in my brain sometimes.

Loving Wife, Working Mom, for dang real. *hooking up Netflix IV to work computer*

Creative Junkie said...

Your mind is like Gump's box of chocolates - did you know that?

My husband refuses to do Netflix. He would rather pay $2 for a movie at Blockbuster 2 miles away, then keep it for ten days because he "just didn't make it back there" so we wind up paying $10 for a movie that sucked to begin with, all because this entire process is supposedly easier than simply walking to the mailbox.

robin said...

dude. if you drink thru the pain, within a few weeks you will love the taste of coffee. for starters make a felt coffee cup with little sugar cubes and a splash of cream.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

How's about we pour a gallon of sugar and milk into zee coffee? Then it'll taste GREAT!

Have a good weekend!

Julie Rodgers said...

I have a Snuggie. It totally rocks. Not trying to rub it in but I have one and you don't, na-na-ne-boo-boo. It's even hot pink so it's not only cuddly and warm, it's cute too. No you can't borrow it. :)

w said...

you still don't have a snuggie? man. i should have sent you one along with your care package today.

i have four. a pink one. a zebra one. a leopard one. and another pink one. jealous much?

Sara said...

Oh My Word....
#5- the GROSSEST thing I've ever thoguth about. Also, what my face probably really looks like underneath.
#14- 2 words... FLAVORED CREAMER
#20- How has no one given you this? If/ when I get to Nashville I am hand- delivering one. Which would make me the ultimate stalker.

Amy said...

I feel like I discovered Netflix late and now I can't live without it! They have every movie ever made--my queue has ridiculous old movies and my husband laughs at me, but if Netflix suggests "Say Anything" who am I to say no?
Also, I hate coffee but I LOVE chai latte--caffeine AND sugary goodness.

Insanitykim said...


I played a joke that I thought would be fun-nay, but I got all confused-ay, and then felt jerk-ay, and then finally dumb-ay.


A said...

Coffee is a necessity in this house and.... we don't have Netflix (can I say that?)

angie128 said...

No worries. I drink enough coffee for the both of us.

The Ashes said...

I love coffee.
And Netflix

Christian Mommy Writer said...

Netflix is great...if you actually watch the movies! :-)

The felt doritos were pretty cool. And snuggies rock!

Thanks for visiting me on my SITS day!

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