Who Am I?

Well, inquisitive reader, let me answer. I am a wife, a mom and I have chronic bad hair. I like made uppy words and Unnecessary Capitalization. If you know who the guy in the bottom right picture is, you're probably my best friend. Also, I own several Edward dolls which I write about HERE. No, I don't use drugs. By the way, if your love canned tomatoes, visit my stash HERE.

Friday, June 18, 2010

Keyboard Confessions - The Last Day of Work Edition

Every week I sit down and confess some things.  Mostly this is just an excuse to write a list.

1.  Here at Legal Importanty Office it's my very last day of work.  Haha, actually, just the last day I'll get PAID to work.  Because this sister doesn't get a dime for washing underwears at home.  Unless I find a dime in the dirty clothes.  It's mine.  Mine, I say.  My Diet Cokes don't come cheap.

2.  I had an awful dream the other night that I had to drive through streets filled with powdered sugar.  Apparently, powdered sugar is really slippery.

3.  In that dream, I could only afford to feed my kids Top Ramen and I only was able to drink the broth.  I woke up from that dream thinking "Huh.  Well, not a bad idea."

4.  My coworker, you know, the one who tried to make us all fat with Sun Drop Cake?  Yeah, her.  She asked me the other day what I'd miss from Alabama. I got to thinking.  You know what I'll miss?  Humidity. 

5.  PSYCH. 

6.  My sweet coworkers gave me some going away gifts yesterday.  Guess what one of the gifts they gave me?

7.  Ohhhh yeahhhhhh.  Me and my Snuggie and my booklight will be doing some serious chillage.  Except, guess what?  We won't even have a couch when we move.  So it'll be me, my Snuggie and my booklight chilling on my camping chair doing some serious chillage.  You know you're jealous of my life.  I would be too.  I'll be sipping on some Top Ramen broth, too. 

8.  I'm getting my hairs cut.  The normal hairs.  The ones on the top of my noggin.  It's time.  Time, I say.  Because right now I feel like this:


9.  Except, guess what I do with my hairs everyday?  This:



10.  So what's the point, I ask you? 

11.  Fall of 2011, my Hubs and I have a date with IKEA.  Then, winter of 2011, my Hubs and I have a date with a marriage counselor because of all our fighting whilst putting together furniture from IKEA.  It's good to plan ahead, right? 

12.  Homeschool.  A chance to decide if I should make alcohol a part of my life. 

13.  PSYCH.  maybe.

14.  I'm thinking of making a whole bunch of homemade cinnamon rolls for my new neighbors.  Wouldn't it suck, though, if they're all healthy type folks with diabetes?  Maybe I should pass out fruit roll ups or Sorbees.  I need to think on this.

15.  All you non-healthy folks don't know what Sorbees are.  They're a sugar free candy company.  I hope their candy tastes better now than it did back in 1986.  *shudder*

16.  Beach Towel Snuggie.  For people who don't want to be seen in a bathing suit but still enjoy the beach. 
17.  GENIUS.

18.  12 more days until Eclipse. I've got my tickets in my bag.  Oh yes I do.  *cabbage patch*  Also, it might be the very last date I go on with my Hubs seeing as how we know not one soul where we're moving. I plan on splurging on popcorn AND Twizzlers.  This sister knows how to party, I tell you.

19.  I'm trying to clean out my cupboards and freezer before we move.  So at some point, I'll be serving a fine meal to my family consisting of salmon, canned pumpkin and a tin of sardines. 

20.  It kind of makes you happy I'll have Top Ramen to fall back on, huh?

Happy Weekend.

21 comments:

Unknown said...

congrats on your last day of (paid) work.

Also, I'm wondering, why do those snuggies not have pockets for snacks, books, and compartments for other important mommy things---like a flask...

Unknown said...

YAY for your last day of work! I'm jumping up and down and cheering for you.

Unknown said...

Also, I don't have a snuggie yet

So jealous.

Unknown said...

And, I think your powered sugar ramen broth dream sounds delish.

Unknown said...

And I wish my neighbors would make me cinnamon rolls. Heck, I wish ANYONE would make me cinnamon rolls.

Love cinnamon rolls.

Unknown said...

Also, I fully plan on gaining back my top commenter crown, Winn. Slowly but surely, it will be mine again.

Lemonade Makin' Mama said...

Okay the date with Ikea and then the date with a marriage counselor because of Ikea? BRILLIANT!!!

Miss Mandy said...

First - your labeling should win an award.

Second - my kids want to take hubs to Toy Story 3 for Father's Day. Guess which OTHER movie I won't be able to see right away...*tears*

Third - Ramen is a surefire way of loosening the bowels.

Shelley said...

Can I just say how much I love your lists?? I love them! My mom always kept the money from our laundry and I fully plan on doing it too. All's fair!

Shelley said...

Oh and congrats on not having to go to work anymore! So jealous! I would rather do laundry and dishes and vacuum than sit in this stinkin office 5 days a week! At least I get paid though...hm...

Confessions From A Work-At-Home Mom said...

OMG, the Snuggie Beach Towel is CRACKING.ME.UP. Seriously, why go to the beach if you're going to cover up that much? Too funny. Didn't even know it existed!!!

Congrats on your last day of work. I am only 8.5 months behind you (I hope!).

~Elizabeth

leigh hewett said...

I love you.

Macey said...

I want a beach towel snuggie.
And while I would love to talk about the virtues of a beach towel snuggie, I must go.
I just ate about 3 lbs of grapes. Uh oh.

Shauna said...

You know that Colorado is much closer to Oregon than Alabama is, right? You're getting closer to me!! I'll come see you, if you'll let me. Love your list. And I'd love to see what powdered sugar means in a dream... hmmmmm.

Shell said...

I was cracking up at your IKEA one. OMG. I love their stuff, but the assembly drives me nuts.

A beach snuggie? Isn't that HOT??? Much as I hate being seen in a bathng suit, I hate being hot even more.

Beth Zimmerman said...

Good Heavens, Girl!
I LOVE your lists! You make me laugh weekly! I hope Ramen broth gives you enough energy to continue doing so!

robin said...

BAHAHAHAHAHA! the beach towel snuggie.......

when i go to the beach EVERYBODY is gonna see my flab baby! i am all about the tanning. my secret is to only go to the beach at places where i don't know a soul.......

The Retired One said...

Your random thoughts list always makes me smile. Your mind is a wonderful thing!!!

Katherine said...

I keep all the change I find doing laundry in a jar next to the washer. I don't let anyone touch it. It's my current retirement plan. And I also wear my hair in a ponytail.every.single.day.

Vanessa said...

HOORAY for the Snuggie!

... but the beach towel one? I bet even a mumu would be more comfortable...

w said...

li'l tot walked around target looking for a father's day gift. and on her own she yelled out...

"snugggggggie! i want that for daddy!"

yeah. he's getting a puppy one. lucky guy.

Related Posts with Thumbnails