Keyboard Confessions - The Last Day of Work Edition

Every week I sit down and confess some things.  Mostly this is just an excuse to write a list.

1.  Here at Legal Importanty Office it's my very last day of work.  Haha, actually, just the last day I'll get PAID to work.  Because this sister doesn't get a dime for washing underwears at home.  Unless I find a dime in the dirty clothes.  It's mine.  Mine, I say.  My Diet Cokes don't come cheap.

2.  I had an awful dream the other night that I had to drive through streets filled with powdered sugar.  Apparently, powdered sugar is really slippery.

3.  In that dream, I could only afford to feed my kids Top Ramen and I only was able to drink the broth.  I woke up from that dream thinking "Huh.  Well, not a bad idea."

4.  My coworker, you know, the one who tried to make us all fat with Sun Drop Cake?  Yeah, her.  She asked me the other day what I'd miss from Alabama. I got to thinking.  You know what I'll miss?  Humidity. 

5.  PSYCH. 

6.  My sweet coworkers gave me some going away gifts yesterday.  Guess what one of the gifts they gave me?

7.  Ohhhh yeahhhhhh.  Me and my Snuggie and my booklight will be doing some serious chillage.  Except, guess what?  We won't even have a couch when we move.  So it'll be me, my Snuggie and my booklight chilling on my camping chair doing some serious chillage.  You know you're jealous of my life.  I would be too.  I'll be sipping on some Top Ramen broth, too. 

8.  I'm getting my hairs cut.  The normal hairs.  The ones on the top of my noggin.  It's time.  Time, I say.  Because right now I feel like this:

9.  Except, guess what I do with my hairs everyday?  This:

10.  So what's the point, I ask you? 

11.  Fall of 2011, my Hubs and I have a date with IKEA.  Then, winter of 2011, my Hubs and I have a date with a marriage counselor because of all our fighting whilst putting together furniture from IKEA.  It's good to plan ahead, right? 

12.  Homeschool.  A chance to decide if I should make alcohol a part of my life. 

13.  PSYCH.  maybe.

14.  I'm thinking of making a whole bunch of homemade cinnamon rolls for my new neighbors.  Wouldn't it suck, though, if they're all healthy type folks with diabetes?  Maybe I should pass out fruit roll ups or Sorbees.  I need to think on this.

15.  All you non-healthy folks don't know what Sorbees are.  They're a sugar free candy company.  I hope their candy tastes better now than it did back in 1986.  *shudder*

16.  Beach Towel Snuggie.  For people who don't want to be seen in a bathing suit but still enjoy the beach. 

17.  GENIUS.

18.  12 more days until Eclipse. I've got my tickets in my bag.  Oh yes I do.  *cabbage patch*  Also, it might be the very last date I go on with my Hubs seeing as how we know not one soul where we're moving. I plan on splurging on popcorn AND Twizzlers.  This sister knows how to party, I tell you.

19.  I'm trying to clean out my cupboards and freezer before we move.  So at some point, I'll be serving a fine meal to my family consisting of salmon, canned pumpkin and a tin of sardines. 

20.  It kind of makes you happy I'll have Top Ramen to fall back on, huh?

Happy Weekend.

Keyboard Confessions

Every week, I sit down and confess some things. Mostly it's just an excuse to write a list.

1. This week could be described as this: Mucus, the plague of my face.

2. It occurs to me that mucus is like boogers on a liquid diet.

3. I had you at "mucus", didn't I? Also, my mother is gagging. Sorry, Mom.

4. My youngest daughter was supposed to be at work with me today. My mother in law took pity on me and kept both of my kids.

5. My mother in law deserves a Klondike Bar.

6. My kids deserve a nap.

7. I made it through Christmas without receiving a Snuggie.

8. This shall be my first purchase post Christmas.

9. Have you seen Avatar yet? You need to. In 3D. It's a must.

10. It's time for me to trim my nails. When I draw blood when I scratch an itch, it's definitely time to trim my nails.

11. I just got a haircut. I said "Just a trim, maybe thin it out a bit". What she heard was "Please make me look horrible for the next few months, kthanx".

12. I should never have added "You're the professional and I trust your judgment."

13. Live and learn. And also, carry a hair clip and/or rubber band at all times.

14. It's time to think about weight loss. Remember last year? When I blogged about Incentives and posted this pic?

Yeaaahhh. Sadly, we look nothing like this.

15. However, I'm very sure there are ab muscles beneath the muffin top. Somewhere.

16. It might take another year to find them, though.

17. I'm pretty sure my Hubs could just do with a spray tan and be fine.

18. My life is pretty much like this commercial:

19. I was reminded of this past post. So far, my brainwashing hasn't helped one.little.bit.

20. Today is the last day of one of my coworkers. She is the only Twilight Sympathizer in the office. I shall be alone. Except for Edward.

21. Speaking of Edward, he got a little sumpin for Christmas from my kids:

22. I watched Sherlock Holmes the other night on a date with the Hubs. Watching that movie made me realize if I ever go to England I'm going to have to turn to my Hubs 57 times a day and ask "What did he just say?" Because I couldn't understand a durn word.

23. I know this because even here in the South amidst Alabamians I have to ask the same thing.

24. I'm pretty sure they all think I'm partially deaf.

Happy Wednesday.